Sometimes people just don't know what LOVE is...

If there is one thing in the whole world people just don't understand, it is love. The reason is because it has been so distorted by sin that people don't know what it really is anymore. But God! Is not just going to leave us hanging, He gave us Scripture for a reason. He knew we were going to screw this up so He made a way for us to begin understanding again this Truth, it is an ongoing learning process but when Christ sets up an example for us to follow, we better listen and we better follow. Jesus addresses this in John 15:13. Listen to this verse carefully, God created Love (I think He should know how it really works) and the Apostle John was the "disciple whom Jesus loved" which tells me he is probably the only person on the planet to come the closest to understanding the depths of God's Love. The verse says:

"Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends."

Here is the context of that verse: after the Lord's Supper before the crucifixion before He is arrested. Which means they're sitting there after the Passover and Jesus is talking to them, John records in four chapters some of what Jesus tells them. This is one of those things, said right in the middle of what He is telling them and if you think about it, this is only a few hours before He was to be arrested. Judas has already left to deny Him, Peter has already been confused about why he is going to deny Him. And here is Jesus telling the disciples exactly why (had they been paying attention) He was about to do what He did.

He Loved them, us, we are those friends he laid His life down for. It was us He loved. Now think about it: could this Love come from a feeling He got? Think about it! People say love is a feeling, but it's not! If Jesus had made decisions based on feelings where do you think we would have ended up at? "Hmm... You know God, I really don't feel like taking on your wrath for all sin in the world today. I kinda like the way I look, I don't necessarily want to get over 90% of my skin ripped off this morning. Umm... that crown of thorns? I would really prefer one of gold, ya know? I don't really feel like being mocked today, I'm just going to go on living like everyone else so that I'll blend in and they won't notice I'm different. Hey God, I really don't feel like having most of my back torn off so can we skip the 39 lashes?"

What if Jesus had said that?!?!?!?!?!? Where do you think we would be at? But that isn't what He said, we all know that! It was something along the lines of: "Father? This is really going to hurt... but I knew they would mess up, and I gave them the option of following Me from the start, but they can't do it. They left Me, I wanted to help them but they wouldn't let Me!! But they are My children, My people, I could choose to hate them because they stabbed Me in the back, or I could choose to Love them. But Loving them is going to be so much harder. That requires dying, I'm God! I can't die! But I will, because that is the only way I can get them back..." What does that tell you about Love?

The world says that love is just a feeling, that it is something you can "fall into" or "fall out off" at a whim. But that is not Truth. The Truth says it is a decision you have to make. You can have an attitude of Love, a heart of Love. But to get that you have to start by deciding to Love. No, not deciding "Well, I kinda like this person, I decide I'm going to love them" that is not correct either. There are different kinds of love, there is the Love of God (the greatest and most perfect Love of all), there is spousal Love (that is Love in purity and in righteousness, a symbolism of God's Love for you), and there is also Brotherly Love (Love between the Believers of Christ). That last one (brotherly Love) is the hardest one to understand it seems. We just don't know how to communicate it, and when someone genuinely Loves you with brotherly Love some people just take it the wrong way. It is when you know that this person is someone you can trust (be them male or female) and you can connect with them through the bond you have in Christ that is when you are able to Love someone with the Love of God. The friendship and fellowship with your family is that which sets us apart from the world, because that friendship is not based on what someone has done, nor is it based on what you can get from the other person, it is based on our relationship with God.

College

Upon leaving EWYR I have had a whirlwind of a schedule to keep! First off, rather than flying back to North Carolina I flew back to Kentucky where I spent the weekend with my family. Monday we drove back to North Carolina, and Tuesday and Wednesday I spent at home running errands and packing for school. Thursday I moved into my dorm, which was empty cause I was the only person on the whole campus who moved in on Thursday, everyone else moved Friday. The past two days have pretty much been chill, getting used to my surroundings, meeting people, hanging out with the other freshmen and such. Today was alot of fun! I went with the New Student Orientation to do a photo scavenger hunt (I didn't have to actually go, I'm not in orientation, I just wanted to go to meet people) and then this evening went to the Q&A dinner, then hung out with some of the other girls in my dorm. I am going to an (from what I've heard) awesome church tomorrow with a group of girls here in Lolley, which is good cause now I have a ride :)

I a really looking forward to this semester, getting to know some of the girls on my floor and talking with them I know this semester is going to be great and that I will learn alot and grow not only from the classes I take but also from the friends I've made.

So excited to see what God has in store!!!!!

Last of Camp

I've been home for a week and realized I never reported on the last two weeks of camp. They were both reunion camps where the kids that came had been here for at least two or three years. during the girl's week I had three girls in my devo group: Britany, Marisa, and Ramona (or Mo). They were absolutely nothing alike and I am still thanking God they got along anyway! Britany was very quiet and shy and at the beginning of the week she would barely talk to me, but at the end of the week she began to talk to me and to let me in on her life. Marisa was completely different, she talked from the moment she got off the bus, she would tell me all about her family and about her life at home, which was defiantly not easy at all. Mo was a character, i loved her to death! And I remembered her from last year (she didn't like me much, but we also didn't get much of a chance to get to know each other). I won't lie, I was scared to death she would hate me and just ignore me all week, but God is good and apparently I was cool enough for her to like! We had a blast, including our very good bonding time while walking through the woods in the pitch black Monday night (following our wonderful outdoorsy-woodsman male staffer who was leading the group through the woods thinking he knew where he was going but as it turns out he can't see in the dark. I, who can see in the dark, did not realize this till later. In retrospect though, it is absolutely hilarious!). So all in all the week went very well.
The boys week also went well, we had 8 young men between 12 and 15 years old. In my devo group was Joel and Chris/JoshS/CJ/Whatever your name is this week/Stamper (we never really knew what to call him cause he changed his name preference so often). Joel is a sweetheart, he was one of my first campers last summer and I was so thrilled when he remembered me! We had a blast through the week and I enjoyed seeing how much they had learned and grown since last summer! CJ had actually come earlier in the summer as a SIT (staffer-in-training) for a week, during that week we was sitting in on one of the devo groups and as one of the staffers was leading another boy in the prayer of salvation CJ also prayed to receive Christ. Then he came as a camper that last week and now he is really wanting to come back for a full summer next year. Pray that he stays strong and that he is able to come back next summer and that God will grow him in ways that will prepare him for his job as a staffer.

Boy's reunion camp

This week has been great! We had 11 campers between 10 and 14 years old. They were mostly all responsive and listened very well to the Gospel. There was one little boy in my group, Jordan, who was raised Mormon but when we talked to him about Christ he just soaked it all in. He was also a compulsive lier, and starting from monday when he got here we all could tell that. By thursday he had cut down a whole lot on the amount of lying.
It was so amazing to see and reconnect with some of the young men who were in my devo groups last year and to see how much they had grown over the year. It is hard having one week with a child to influence them for Christ's sake and then have to send them home to their families and schools where they are influenced 51 weeks out of the year against your one week. It breaks your heart and you pray for a year that they will be strong and that God will preserve them, then they come back to camp, and for three of my boys (Tim, Jason, and Manuel specifically) it was amazing to see that they had been involved with Church and they had begun listening to Christian music and that they are stronger than last year. But they stand at a brink in their lives where they must decide where they will stand, if they will follow Christ and go against a very stong current or if they will give in to what is easier. It beraks my heart, I love them so much, and I want them to know God is such a real and powerful way and not just know about Him. I think that this is the hardest part of working and loving these kids.

Reunion Girls

This week was a difficult one. I knew and remembered everyone of the girls that came and they all remembered me, which was awesome, and the girls did awesome while they were here.There were 16 girls that came, we were over capacity but it worked anyway, we had three girls and two staff sleeping in a tent outside the bunkhouse. My three girls were Brittney, Alissa, and Kaylie, I loved all three of them so much and wanted to help them learn about Christ and about how much He loves them and I wanted to show them how much I love them but it was hard. Brittney liked starting everything and her main goal was to get attention, I tried giving her positive attention but when all she would do is act out it was difficult. Alissa didn't know the meaning of the word "forgiveness", she would hold a grudge all day and it was never her fault. Kaylie was a sweetheart who never let anything or anyone get her down, and although she didn't especially like the other two girls she would tolerate them. It was difficult to see if what I was doing was the right thing, that they would respond to the best and would teach them the best but sometimes you can't see what will and will not work till after the fact. In the end I had to simply do something and trust that God would use what I felt He wanted me to do in a manner that would help them. 

The only thing that seemed to make my week seem useful was the Indonesian Hut. I taught the kids about mission work in Southeast Asia and about the Muslim faith and culture in Indonesia and about how much they all need Christ. We had bought different foods and candies from Indonesia at a world food market in Albuquerque and I wore my traditional shirt and taught them some of the funny customs there that they would find interesting. We also taught them what few words and phrases I wrote down. Then on the last day we presented the Gospel using the E-cubes and taught them how to use one to tell their friends about God. We also told them that if they had never accepted Christ into their lives that we were all her to talk to at any time. That evening one of the girls, Cheyeanna, came up to me and told me that she wanted to talk to me and Josh about accepting Christ. So the next morning (it just so happened that when she asked me it was 10 at night and about time for lights out) we went out to meet Josh and sitting on the front porch she accepted Christ.It was amazing and made my week feel like it was worth something. In all honesty if I had to do that every week for a whole summer and she was the only one to know Him from that it would be well worth it!

Half way point.

I can't believe that this summer is over halfway over! It seems as if I just got here! These past two weeks have been rather rough for me; last week, during girl's camp, I had a girl named Renee. She had an attitude, she would occasionally decided she just didn't like this activity and just quit or refuse to even try to participate. She basically fought me and the other staff tooth and nail to do her own thing. But what she wanted was attention, and the only attention she had ever gotten was negative attention. The only way she new to get attention was to act out. I tried my hardest to give her as much positive attention as I could, but sometimes it was just hard!

Also there was Nicole, she was as sweet as could be, but she considered herself to be ugly. She didn't have extraordinary feminine features, and she was insecure about that. She didn't have any friends because she moved schools frequently and thought herself socially awkward. But by the end of the week she had not only found a friend with Renee, but also found a friend in Jesus.

This past week, during boy's camp, we had two young men in our devo group. Nathan and Tommy. Nathan told us on Monday that the only reason why he came was because his mom made him. By Thursday afternoon he told me he was going to miss us all and that he didn't want to go home. He was very self destructive, he scared me to death Monday saying that he had broken all these different bones and then he told me he was wanted to break a leg this week while he was here (thank God he didn't). Funny thing is: by Tuesday night he would give me a hug before he went to bed, the unloved felt loved!

Tommy, on the other hand, was a completely different story! He was Bipolar and ADHD, that wasn't bad, we had other kids who had the same thing and it wasn't a problem... Tommy's thing was he thought he would never be able to function without his meds. So that caused issues, he thought that when he was in a certain mood he could not get out of it until he had been given his meds, had eaten, or slept. He was another child who had only gotten negative attention and also needed constant attention. If you were not interacting with him at all times, he would fight with the kids sitting around him. I pray that some of what was taught to him got through to him, because he would not pay attention to the devos or the lessons or the adventure rec debriefings. But he was a very loving young man, he absolutely adored me and Leanna, and I loved some of the things he would tell me. For instance, Wednesday he asked me when we were going to spend time together again. What he meant was when was 1 to 1 time when the two of us would play games and do activities together. He loved it, cause he had my full, absolute attention for an hour and a half.

Keep praying for the camp, this upcoming week we have girl reunion campers. Which means I know all the kids that will be coming! But there will be 15 campers, myself and the other Sarah will be staying in a tent with about three of the kids.

Thank you all for the prayers, and all the support.

Boys week, 3rd week of camp

This week we had a group of 10 boys. We had a few special cases and had to rearrange a few things from the norm. We had one camper who had a very rough life and for a couple reasons was put in the ranch house to stay with a couple of the staff guys. I had in my group the brother of the girl who believed in the Olympian Greek gods. His name is Travis, he came in very set in his beliefs but when we started talking to him, he began to question what he had always known. I prayed for him for three days and on Wednesday when we presented the gospel he prayed to God to forgive him for his sin. He told me later he decided that the Greek gods were more like superheroes like the X-men and that God was the true God. It was awesome, and I am very glad that he will be able to go back home and help Celina, his sister.
Pray for Travis and Celina though, their parents still have a Wiccan worldview and he told me that their mother is a white witch. Keep the staff in prayer always, we are beginning to feel the effects of sleep deprivation and exhaustion. This up coming week is a girls week and the girls in the bunkhouse need extra prayer because it is very exhausting to be with the girls 24/5.
Thank you all and love you!